Honesty And Integrity in Sobriety

Los Angeles, California—June 25, 2009

And what does that have to do with getting sober? On the surface it would seem that honesty and integrity both have same meaning. The dictionary definition is: free of deceit and untruthfulness. The quality of being honest. Ultimately in sobriety that’s what we strive for. But is there a difference between honesty and integrity? And does it really matter?

It does if you are an alcoholic or an addict who has been lying for years. It does if you want to stop drinking and using drugs. Because without working a 12-step program and being rigorously honest with yourself and everyone around you, the odds of staying sober are not very good. So is there a difference between honesty and integrity?

There is, from what I’ve learned after spending a year in Liberty House, a structured sober living recovery home located in century city, Los Angeles, California. From practicing the principles that I learned in the house I now know the difference. My father told me a story many years ago that maid me chuckle and help shed some light on what we’re talking about.

A woman walks into a butcher shop and buys a chicken. When it comes time to pay for her chicken she reaches into her purse and gives the butcher a brand new crisp one hundred dollar bill. Since the chicken was only ten dollars he gives her back ninety dollars change, says thank you very much and she walks out of the store very content with her purchase. As the butcher is putting the one hundred dollar bill in the cash register he discovers that there were two hundred dollar bills stuck together. Now, the moral dilemma. Does he pocket the extra money? If he is honest man he will run out of the store and give the woman back her extra hundred-dollar bill or does he keep the money and have the integrity to tell his partner about it?

Obviously the honest thing to do would be to return the money to the lady but what this story points out is that integrity is about being honest when no one is looking. Chris O. Manager and a graduate of the program knows all about what it takes to change, “The structure of Liberty House encourages honesty and integrity by holding residents to a line that they can’t or won’t hold themselves to. We set the bar high so that the guys in the house can learn through their daily chores that it’s about their actions not their intentions. What you are in the house is what you are in the outside world.

If your behavior is dishonest and sleazy addict behavior, the structure of the house will point it out. The program is designed to bring that type of behavior to the surface so that everyone can see it for what it is. When it is pointed out to the addict over and over again how they are behaving then we can begin the process and take action to change that behavior.” If you can’t honestly admit to yourself the depth of the problem and how bad your life is then you don’t stand a chance of staying sober.

The structure of Liberty House is one of the only programs in the country that will spend an incredible amount of time and energy breaking down the bad behavior of the alcoholic/addict so that they can see for themselves how they are being dishonest. Sobriety is not just about cleaning up from drugs and alcohol. It’s about learning how to live with honesty and integrity. Because without those two essential character traits, honesty and integrity, the kind of life, and quality of sobriety attained doesn't sustain one over the long run.

The dishonesty and lack of integrity just doesn't allow us to go to bed at night feeling good about ourselves.  Then it's not long before we say "to he'll with this sobriety stuff" and drink again.

Copyright ©2006, The Liberty House
All Rights Reserved. | 877.368.4258